· Janine Murphy-Neilson
Kids Aren’t the Only Ones Who Struggle With Transitions!
Ah, the start of another school year. What could be better? There used to be a great office supply commercial that played the Christmas song “The Most…
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· Janine Murphy-Neilson
Shrinking With the Stars: Hey Ted Lasso Show, Why is Redemption for Everyone but Marriage Therapists?
First off let me say, there will be spoilers for season 3 of Ted Lasso here and secondly let me say I truly enjoyed the show. Yes there were some…
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· Janine Murphy-Neilson
“Ain’t That Just Like Me?” Yes David Bowie It Is, Thank You!
Today I heard someone say, in reference to David Bowie’s death, that for him rock stars had been more like prophets than just entertainers. That people like…
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· Janine Murphy-Neilson
Unresolved Trauma Creates The Walking Wounded Who Live Amongst Us
Yes those pictures are of the same man. This week the death of the great David Bowie has been a real loss that I will be writing more about later but last…
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· Janine Murphy-Neilson
Shrinking With the Stars: Benedict Cumberbatch as Hamlet is Very Therapeutic Indeed
Shakespeare is apparently very happening right now and thank goodness because after recently seeing Hamlet I’m reminded of how powerful Shakespeare can be and…
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· Janine Murphy-Neilson
Attention High School Seniors and Parents-Breathe It Will All Be OK!
Ah yes, fall is here—time for beautiful leaves, hot apple cider and college applications. Yikes! It can be a very stressful time for families. In my practice…
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· Janine Murphy-Neilson
5 Tips for Fair Fighting
Into every life conflict will arise. This is the inevitable reality we must all wrap our minds around. I know we don’t like it. I know we wish it could be…
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· Janine Murphy-Neilson
Happy Mother’s Day! Helpful Lessons From Women I Have Known
I rue the days when I rolled my eyes at my mother for complaining that being a mom was the hardest job of all. How little I understood about the constancy and…
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· Janine Murphy-Neilson
Arguing With Your Partner? How To Take a Break That is Productive
I see so many couples on the right track. They seem to understand that sometimes during an argument it may be a good idea to take a break to avoid further…
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· Janine Murphy-Neilson
What Does It Mean To “Be Strong” During Grief?
I can’t tell you how many times I hear from grieving people how they want to “be strong,” “seem strong” or are afraid of “not being strong.” I don’t know…
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· Janine Murphy-Neilson
Shrinking With the Stars: American Sniper and the Heartbreak of PTSD
I’m not sure what to make of the controversy that’s surrounded the movie American Sniper. I know that there are some conflicting stories about Chris Kyle, the…
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· Janine Murphy-Neilson
Toddlers Are Not the Only Ones Who Hate Transitions-How to Help
Is there any worse transition than the month of January? We go from two months (more if you count the time the malls start ramping up) of planning…
Read more →· Janine Murphy-Neilson
Why I Tell Couples… “Go Away!”
No, I’m not trying to show clients my door by telling them to get out but I am trying to tell them to get out of their own front doors and find adventure…
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· Janine Murphy-Neilson
The move!
Happy New Year to all! My move to the new office is complete and I look forward to seeing you all there in the upcoming weeks. The new office has the…
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· Janine Murphy-Neilson
Shrinking with the Stars–It’s a Wonderful Life
Yes you have heard of Dancing With the Stars but today I will start a new feature of my blog that I am calling Shrinking With the Stars. It’s a place where I…
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· Janine Murphy-Neilson
Holidays May Not Be So Merry When You’re Grieving–5 Ways to Cope
One of the difficulties of going through grief is feeling so out of sync with the rest of the world. This feeling is multiplied tenfold around the holidays…
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· Janine Murphy-Neilson
Little Acts of Kindness Add Up
This is a great relationship article from all places the Business Insider. It talks about some interesting research on what contributes to a couple’s…
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· Janine Murphy-Neilson
Turkey With a Big Side Dish of Family! 3 Tips to Help You Keep Your Sanity
Ah the holidays! A magical, fun time or a time where everyone loses their minds? Maybe it is both but it most certainly is an opportunity to practice…
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· Janine Murphy-Neilson
Conflict Is Not a Four Letter Word-Tips to Make it Work For You
No one likes conflict but some people go to wild extremes to avoid anything that even resembles conflict. As a result I usually see people struggling in one…
Read more →· Janine Murphy-Neilson
Finding healing and acceptance after same-sex love collides with religion
Finding healing and acceptance after same-sex love collides with religion A devout Catholic family finds healing through the very religious beliefs that…
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· Janine Murphy-Neilson
If I Have Gay Children: Four Promises From A Christian Pastor/Parent
If I Have Gay Children: Four Promises From A Christian Pastor/Parent. It is my pleasure to share this article from a Christian pastor. I have seen so much…
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· Janine Murphy-Neilson
What to Expect From your Partner and Yes, Yourself When You Start Couples Counseling
My last post talked about what to expect from your therapist when you begin couples counseling and now I would like to address the equally important topic of…
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· Janine Murphy-Neilson
The Article “6 Reasons Marriage Counseling is BS” is…BS!
Nothing like getting fired up on a Monday morning. I read a miserable article yesterday by an author who wrote a book called “The Surrendered Wife” saying…
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· Janine Murphy-Neilson
5 THINGS THAT YOU SHOULD SEE FROM YOUR THERAPIST WHEN YOU START COUPLES COUNSELING
Seeking out help for their relationship can be a daunting and uncomfortable task for couples to contemplate, let alone begin. For some, sharing innermost…
Read more →· Janine Murphy-Neilson
No Protection from Depression – Part 2, the Plan
When dealing with life threatening events we try to take action. If someone is losing a lot of blood we don’t sit around and ponder if we should see a doctor…
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· Janine Murphy-Neilson
“HAVING IT ALL” IS NO PROTECTION FROM DEPRESSION: PART 1, DEPRESSION IS NOT THE SAME AS BUMMED OUT!
The suicide of Robin Williams is scary. It makes us feel vulnerable. We like to think that things make sense in this world. In our rational minds it makes…
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· Janine Murphy-Neilson
7 Ways To Start Healing Your Relationship After an Affair (Part 2 tips 4-7)
Here are the rest of the tips. Hope they are helpful for you. #4–Rebuild goodwill while working to repair the relationship. Lots of things need to be looked…
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· Janine Murphy-Neilson
7 Ways to Start Healing Your Relationship After an Affair (Part 1 tips 1-3)
Let’s start with a reality check for everyone. If an affair has happened in your relationship then there is damage to repair and this may take awhile. And…
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· Janine Murphy-Neilson
Parental Involvement is Overrated- Can This Be True?!
There was a recent article in the New York Times called Parental Involvement is Overrated which has caused quite a stir in recent weeks. What this article…
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· Janine Murphy-Neilson
Let’s Put The Spanking Issue To Bed
I am very surprised that in this day and age with the vast amount of research on this issue that we are still debating the merits of spanking. Last week on…
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· Janine Murphy-Neilson
When ‘Just A Friend’ Is Really ‘Just’ A Big Threat To Your Marriage
After working with couples for nineteen years I would like to take a moment and dispel of few myths about affairs. Myth #1: Affairs are just about sex. This…
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· Janine Murphy-Neilson
Why Routines Are So Important to Children
I had the privilege of working in preschools prior to becoming a therapist as both an assistant teacher and then as a teacher. It was a great education for…
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· Janine Murphy-Neilson
Ellen DeGeneres–I Sadly Beg to Differ
In the recent issue of People magazine there was an article where Ellen De Generes was quoted as saying “Coming out is not a big deal anymore.” Unfortunately…
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· Janine Murphy-Neilson
Grief work-It’s a Tough Sell
We teach children at a very early age to avoid pain: to not touch a hot stove, to watch their fingers when a door is shut, to look both ways before crossing…
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· Janine Murphy-Neilson
Why Helping Your Friend or Loved One Doesn’t Seem to Help At All
We hate to see people we care about upset or hurting in any way and we want to figure out how to make it better. This is a very caring and loving response and…
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· Janine Murphy-Neilson
Valentine’s Day: Hallmark Holiday or Opportunity?
On the radio today I heard a DJ talk about Valentine’s Day and how he has been with his wife for so long he didn’t really do much of anything for the day. He…
Read more →· Janine Murphy-Neilson
Perhaps We Could All Work on Growing Compassion
When my daughter was in preschool the teacher would ask the children to grow patience. I always loved this expression and today I’m wondering if we could all…
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· Janine Murphy-Neilson
You can’t wait 18 years to Pay Attention to Your Marriage
As a therapist I am surprised how often I ask couples what they do for fun and they can’t answer me. Seems as though some couples are not having any fun-they…
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